So, today was HIV mother day. Every Wednesday is. All our moms have HIV. And you can’t believe how many mothers there are. It is one of our longest days. What it is, the HIV mothers that have been coming to clinic for their prenatal care, who have now delivered, need to come back for a check up for both them and their baby. They do this until the child turns 2 years old. They are to do this monthly. First we weigh the babies, then the moms, then they go into one of the exam rooms and see Dr. Moshi, our OB/Gyn. Also, and this may be the sad part, and it is likely judgemental of me to say that, but most of them are pregnant again.
On top of that, we have the newly diagnosed pregnant mothers with HIV status. As you can see, a long long day.
So many dilemmas. Each individual woman has the right to a say to her own life. Our integrity as human beings want to give that right. And we do. And cherish the individual. My brother informed me when reading the blog that Tanzania has the 11th fastest growing population in the world. If it continues at this rate, and who’s to say it won’t, it will have doubled population in 20 years. And quadrupled in 40 years. And it has very, very limited resources.
I did a “no-no” today. We are instructed that we will hear many sad stories, but never give anyone any money. One of the HIV mothers today, when Alodia was doing the intake, broke down in tears. Her husband had deserted her. She already had a little girl at home, and now pregnant again. She didn’t know what to do. Tanzania does not have services for this. When she came back into my exam room, I just looked at her kindly, and said, “Pole” (sorry) and with just that little bit of kindness, she fell into my arms sobbing. She told me, “The rent man comes tonight, I have no money to feed my child, I don’t know what to do.” This was in no way a scam. This was this woman’s reality.
I did my examination. She calmed down. As she was leaving, I took all the cash I had in my pocket, and slipped it into hers. I tried to do it without her noticing, but she did. I told her, “Hapana kusema”. (Say nothing). She nodded tearfully and left.
Now, all I had in my pocket was about 17,000 schillings. About maybe $8. That’s all. Pretty much nothing for me. Less than what we pay for a 3 entree fast food at Panda Express. But it may feed her and her child for a week or more. Was that wrong? I don’t know. I could get in big trouble for it.
Oh, the contrasts of Africa. And the dilemmas. As I leave the hospital tomorrow, I will think on that. My time at St. Elizabeth’s is coming to a close. I will be going to Zanzibar for my last week here in Africa for a very much needed R & R. In all honesty I am exhausted. I will be returning to Oregon soon, to pick up that hectic life. But, what is life here? I keep asking myself that.
LaLa Salama "sleep tonight in peace" 
Happy Trails to you, I’m glad you are getting a rest. You provided so much information and perspective for all of your followers. So valuable. Thank you so much!
LikeLike
This made me very sad to read this, and it makes one appreciate what we have here in our country. I hope that this woman find some sort of relative to move in with to help her (wishful thinking). I remember the story of my Johnson grandmother who was found begging with her two children on the streets of Stockholm during the mid 1800s. There was a terrible famine in the countryside. What happened to change that? Immigration to the USA, education, all of that was a factor in what made a better life for her descendants. I don’t know what the answer is, but I have read a bit about the challenges of Africa (and not all 54 countries are the same) in the Economist, and remember what one article said: “the word “incremental” really applies to the rate of improvement in the African economies.
LikeLike
I would have done the same thing, no-no or not. I cannot imagine how your huge heart deals with seeing so much sadness on the HIV day. Do the babies have HIV as well? Do the mothers get drugs to keep it from turning into AIDS?
LikeLike
If the mothers get the HIV meds, there is usually no transmission to the babies in utero. But very important for the mothers to take it religiously. There are 3 ways babies can have transference of HIV. During pregnancy, during birth, during breastfeeding. As long as moms take the meds, almost 100% effective no transference.
LikeLike
I remember years ago Ann woke up one morning and told me that she was going to go back to school to become a nurse. Call it whatever you want, but in some things in life there seems to be a higher voice that quietly calls or directs us. Our kids were almost raised. She had never mentioned this ever before. She has now been a hospice nurse now for 12 years, blessing those leaving this life. When she went to Africa she had no idea at all what she would be doing, just something medical to help. In her first email to me she described being at customs for four long hours refusing to leave without her suitcases full of medical supplies she had carefully gathered. She wrote me: “I finally just broke down sobbing. I said how much I just wanted to help, How I had been gathering and dreaming for months getting ready for this. I told them I just wanted to help babies come into the world. I was really crying hard. They got really concerned and started patting me on the back, calling me “mama Anna”….One guy even wiped my tears.” And look what she ended up doing, “help babies come into the world.” From helping those leaving life in America to those just coming into life in Africa. I know how some things have been difficult, very difficult for Ann. She is after all, a grandma many times over. I miss her and will be very happy when she is back. But everyone should know that she is my hero, my very own super hero!
LikeLike
What troubled young woman could look into your kindly blue eyes and not want to fall into your
loving arms. Your footprints will be swept away from the sands of Africa but the woman you
helped will remember your kindness forever.
LikeLike
I have absolutely loved your blog! What an awesome experience for you! I didn’t know you were gonna spend a week of R&R but good for you!!
Love you tremendously you have truly changed everyone’s life in Africa!
LikeLike